The Engorger: Part 3

Who likes the lottery?
(Originally written 12/23/2007)

You can scratch my girlfriend off that list.

On the spur of the moment I bought her one of those Crossword scratch-off lottery tickets. I give it to her, then come into the bedroom to finish wrapping Christmas presents and all of a sudden, she pops in the room and says "Should I just kiss you now?" I ask why and she says she won $100 on the lottery ticket. She looks it over six or seven times, and notices that she missed a letter. That would have been eight words, which is $500. That's when she started shaking.

She hands me the ticket and says, "Make sure I got this right." So, I write down all of the words, and sure enough, there was eight. She tells me to check the letters, so I start crossing them out of the words that I wrote down.

Until I get to the "Q."

Evidently, she mistook "Q" for "O."

Yeah, eight words went down to two words which, in the eyes of the New Jersey Lottery, equals shit.

I don't think I need to buy lottery tickets anymore.