The Engorger: Part 1

I think I need to get a Mac.
(Originally written 12/17/2007)

This piece of shit PC is really pissing me off.

Now, my laptop is not the best on the market, granted. But the fact that it takes 20 minutes to close a program is flat out ridiculous. No lie; twenty fucking minutes. To close it! I can understand taking 20 minutes to open a program (I wouldn't put up with it, but I'd understand it) but taking that long to close... Asinine.

All of this is on top of my experiences in the past. For example, I had made a 30 second 3D animation for school back in 2001. It was a cool little thing of a bumblebee in a flightcap zipping around the backyard set to a cool music mix of Edvard Greig's Morning Mood and the Vandals doing Flight of the Bumblebee. Yeah, I would put it up here for you all to see but, since my shitty PC crashed so many times, that no longer exists. Plus, there's the 30 minute movie that I made, starring my firends that took my three months to capture and edit. As soon as I got to the point of saying "This is done," gone, all because of my crap PC.

It's about time for me to switch. I think I'm going to start saving now and work on that by the end of 2008. That is, unless I don't slam my laptop against the wall first.

An Interesting Discovery

Christmas is right around the corner...

(Originally written 12/13/2007)

Is anyone else dreading it as much as I am?

I used to love Christmas. And not just because of the presents (though that may have been the main draw). I loved the feeling in the air, the Christmas music, having dinner with my family. But now that I'm older, Christmas is just a chore.

What it is, I think, that that I have finally realized how commercialized Christmas has become. I thank the last 8 years working in retail for that (Fuck you, department stores!) My girlfriend has been asking me what I want for Christmas, and I have no answer. I honestly don't want anything for Christmas.

I think, all I want, is to go back before the weight of the world took it's toll on me. The time when Santa Claus brought me presents, when Christmas presents were fun to buy because I didn't have to worry about the credit card bill in January, and I had a week and a half off from school instead of one day off from work.

That's what I want for Christmas this year...

...For Good Stuff

Buy some stuff!
(Originally written 12/9/2007)

So I created a CafePress.com shop today. I figure that this is as good a place as any to promote it. The products it has really have nothing to do with Clit & Pecker, but it does feature my artwork. If you want to own a piece of me, now's your chance.

I know this may seem like a lame attempt to capitalize on my readers, but I don't think so. I mean, I don't blame anyone for not buying from CafePress. I won't get mad or say that you suck. All that I'm doing is letting you know that I am featuring some of my work on products that are available to purchase. That's it. No pressure.

Maybe you're wondering why I am not selling C&P merchandise. Well, I plan to. I have some cool things in mind. The only obstacle is to create it and offer it on the site. Okay, that's the second obstacle. The first obstacle is to get some more readers. Then to create the merch, put it on the site, and make sales. There's an order to these things, you know.

Anyway, if you are interested, you can see the CafePress store here. To anyone who purchases anything, you get a hearty thank you for your support in advance. To anyone who visits, well, thanks for being curious. To anyone who ignores this altogether, you get a thanks for reading.

See? Everyone gets props.

The Search...

Why did I go to school?
(Originally written 12/6/2007)

Got a call yesterday. Evidently, it's time for me to start paying back my school loans.

So I asked the person on the phone what my payments would be... My jaw hit the floor. It seems that my monthly payments are almost as much as my rent!

After gathering my breath and slowing the beating of my heart, I told them, politely, that I couldn't friggin' pay that much in a month. They kindly directed me to the consolidation department so that I could combine my loans and have a lower monthly payment.

It gets better.

One of the questions that I was asked is if I wanted to pay the principle and the interest, or just the interest? What the hell kind of question is that? Given a choice, I would like to pay just the principle and interest be damned. These loans aren't compounding, so I'm not charged interest on the interest. I guess they know that their shit is a scam and try their damndest to swindle as many people as possible.

My point is, school is not worth the debt. I have both an Associates and a Bachelors, and I am still working in the same job as when I was attending school. My degrees have not helped me for shit, but here I am, neck deep in debt because of them.

This country sucks. I wish we could have an apprenticeship system like Europe. I know I have the skills. What I don't understand is why I need a friggin' piece of paper to show others that.
My head hurts.

A Love Blossoms

My observations of Spider-Man 3...
(Originally written 12/2/2007)

I was watching it yesterday for the seventh time (that's right; twice in the theaters and 5 times on DVD) and I picked up on something that I hadn't realized before. Let me start from the beginning.

The first time I watched Spider-Man 3, I got so angry that they rewrote the death of Uncle Ben, what with Sandman having been involved. It angered me because Uncle Ben's death is the driving force behind Peter Parker being Spider-Man. See, Peter blames himself for his uncle's death because, as it turns out, the robber that he failed to stop earlier in the night is the same one who shot Uncle Ben. Anyone who reads comics knows and understands this.

However, in the movie, (I guess this is a good time for a Spoiler Alert) it turns out that the bullet that killed Uncle Ben came from Flint Marko's gun, not the robber that Peter failed to stop. This bothered me when I first saw the movie. Why? I'll tell you. It means, even if Peter Parker stopped the robber, his uncle would be dead, at least in the situation that Peter imagined in the movie. Were this to be true, nothing Peter did that night would have saved his uncle, thus, his uncle's death could not be his fault. A equals B, Peter Parker has no motivation for being Spider-Man.

But, at the end of the movie, when the Sandman explains to Peter what happened, I realized that the two events were connected. Sandman tells Peter that when he, Flint Marko, approached Uncle Ben to take the car he, Uncle Ben, tried to reason with Marko. The flashback shows that Marko was receptive to what Ben had to say, until his partner came running out with the cash. At that point, the gun accidentally goes off, killing Ben.

See, Peter's motivation is not shattered. Had Peter stopped the robber earlier, he would not have surprised Flint Marko while he was holding the gun on Uncle Ben and the gun would have, most likely, not gone off.

It could also mean that Peter Parker could have stopped the evolution of the Sandman. Look at it this way. Peter stops the crook, which means that Ben and Marko's conversation would not have been interrupted. Ben convinces Marko to turn his life around. Marko does not get pinched for whatever crime he commits that throws him in jail. This means he does not escape from jail, go on the lam from the cops and never winds up in the experimental sand pit. If anything, the events in Spider-Man 3 would solidify Peter Parker's resolve to be Spider-Man.

Realizing this makes me like this movie even more.

Los Buenos Cigarros

Law and Order
(Originally written 11/30/2007)

I woke up the morning to a Law and Order: Criminal Intent marathon on USA. Why is it that this show always enthralls me? It seems like Vincent D'onofrio has some sort of hypnotic power when he wears a gray suit and a badge. His acting is probably the best that I have ever seen in any television show. Ever. His idiosyncrasies just add so much depth to his character and makes the show great.

Right now I'm watching Special Victims Unit. I used to think that this version was better than CI, but, after seeing more and more CI episodes, I may be switching sides. Not that I don't like SVU. I just may be a Major Case guy from now on.

But it does have the worst opening theme song of the trio.

They Call It "Turkey Day" For a Reason

Another one of those days.
(Originally Written 11/25/2007)

Yep, my life is so boring that I have nothing new to share with you all. Many apologies.

I do have an assignment for a job interview. I have to create some illustrations following specific guidelines. I'm having a rather hard time getting them done, though, with the amount of hours I have been working, and the holiday, and everything. They want it by the 30th. Of this month. Christ, that's not too far off. Looks like I'll be working on this all night. And this doesn't even guarantee me the job. Oh, well. It's worth a shot, so long as it gets me out of retail.